DNA Tan

Cherie Hearts PARENTS-TEACHERS-MEETING

Met up with the boys' teachers for a formal PTM last Saturday. Had never believed in going for any of such as I always feel I know my boys better than their teachers do.

Teacher Lin once again assured me that there is absolutely no need to worry about Donovan's learning abilities and in fact, he is always appointed as the leader to help the slower ones and also to help the teachers set up the classroom and distribute the stationeries. When asked about Don's social skills, the teacher replied that Don has a particular friend whom he is inseperable with. To quote her, "Don and Huckle are always together and Don plus Huckle equals 20 kids". Well, how should I go about interpreting this statement? But Im definitely glad that Don is able to establish friendship with other kids and be of help to his teachers.

Dominus too, has some positive feedback this time. He was initially very very shy, too shy to even squeak in class. But ever since his toilet-training starts and he needs to inform the adults about having to go to the toilet, he bacame more accustomed to talking. The teachers commented that he learns faster than most kids and is one who speaks the most clearly in his group. Not too surprised actually, since he is a January baby and he is 'by right', expected to be able to do those mentioned above. When asked if he has any friends the teachers replied that he doesn't have a particular friend like Don, but is friendly with almost everyone.

There something rather disturbing though. The teacher mentioned that Domi is a well-behaved child who understands rules and works well with routine. When bullied by friends, he'll not attack back but would consult the teacher instead. This, to teachers, is a compliment definitely. However, it felt horrible to me as a mum. Not that I want my boys to be fighters, but I want them to be equipped with the initiative to defend and protect themselves when the need arises. Going to the teacher to explain the matter and then waiting for the teacher to come by and solve the matter would have been a tad too late to nib the problem in the bud. I want him to be able to insist his possession of toys if they were from his hands and I want him to speak up when his friends are unreasonable.

Can we train them to have skills like that? Maybe we can, but somehow in the comfort of home and security of having parents, they always behave like babies. And we as parents, always like to re-live those cute moments and so treat them like babies too. If this continues, how would they ever learn to grow up?